Exchange Theory
Exchange Theory, is when one can give or offer something in exchange for something else. In politics we call this,” Quid Pro Quo”. However, Quid Pro Quo, or Exchange Theory, is practically in every aspect of our lives. When the older man dates the younger woman, he exchanges the security that he can provide for her, in exchange for her youth. When the older woman dates the younger man, she exchanges the stability that she can provide for him, in exchange for his youth. Exchange Theory can only work, if both parties or groups have something to negotiate. It does not make sense for one to come to the bargaining table empty handed, because he or she has nothing to offer. For example, lets take the 55 year-old medical doctor, who lost his wife in a car accident about two-years ago. He meets a 27 year-old waitress at an upscale restaurant. She is petite and very beautiful. The medical doctor and the waitress are now dating, and, they seem to enjoy each other’s company. Here we see Quid Pro Quo, or Exchange Theory at work. The doctor is exchanging his status and position, for her beauty. If the waitress had been about 350 pounds, the medical doctor would not have given her a second look, and, if the waitress was 350 pounds, she probably would not have been hired at the upscale establishment. When dealing with the issues of Exchange Theory, there are a variety of things, that individuals or groups can bring to the negotiating table, such as looks, money, power, sex, opportunities, fame, education, and status. Even nations around the globe use Exchange theory, by using both their tangible and intangible resources to influence the will of others, such as natural resources, material products, and the productivity of labor services. Now Exchange Theory, is not the only social interaction, among individuals or groups. There are three other major social interactions among individuals and groups, which are Cooperation, Competition, and Conflict. However, Exchange Theory or Quid Pro Quo seems to be the prevalent, both inside and outside of politics. Unless, an individual, group, or nation, has something to bargain or negotiate with, there is no need to come to the table, because we all know the old saying, ” if a person cannot bring something to the table, then you need to eat by yourself “. So, if a man says that he wants a good woman, then he must ask himself the question, “what do I have to offer a woman” ? The same question must be asked by a woman who claims that she wants a good man. ” What do I have to offer a man” ? Now, what ladies must understand, is that sex alone, cannot make a relationship, because after a period of time, the sex is going to get old, and, we all know that, four-legs in the bed, does not put any bread on the table. Men, must understand, that going for a woman, just because she is very pretty, will not cut it, when all the bills start rolling in. When a man chooses a woman, he should ask the question, ” if I get sick, can she handle responsibility” ? Women, should ask the same question as well. “Can this guy handle responsibility” ? Anything in life, that one decides to do, he or she must consider the cost, before picking up the cross. It is very dangerous for a person, to get involved with someone, who does not have as much to lose as he or she does. In all things, one must consider Exchange Theory. What do I have to offer, and, what will I get in return?
The Bowtie Professor Speaks!
Tags: Logical Thinking
This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010 at 10:21 am and is filed under Politics And Education, Topics Of Controversy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
This article in alot of ways is very true. When we first meet someone, maybe we do look at what she or he has to offer us. But as the relationship grows it changes completly. One we grow use to being around each other and we just start enjoying each others company. Two the word “Love” now comes into play. By the time we fall in love we seem to care less what we can offer each other is more like we can not live with out each other. So this article is very true in a relationship that is just getting started not in realatinoship that has been around for a while.
AGE IS ALWAYS BEEN A PROBLEM IN TODAY SOCIATY, IF YOUR A FEMALE AND YOU MARRY SOMEONE THAT IS 10 YEARS OLDER THAN YOU THEN PEOPLE WILL START SAYING OH SHE MARRY HIM BECAUSE OF THE MONEY NOT COUNTING THE LOVE THEY HAVE OR LIKE YOU SAY “THE QUID PRO QUO” OR THE EXCHANGE THEORY. AGE IS LIKE GOVERNMENT NO MATTER WHAT YOU HAVE YOU MUST HAVE SOMETHING TO GIVE BACK EVEN IF YUO DON’T HAVE ANYTHING GOVERNMENT WILL TAKE AWAY EVERYTHNG YOU OWE IF YOU DIVORCE THE GOVERNMENT SAME WITH A RELATION SHIP THAT THE AGE IS QUITE A BIT A DIFFERENCE. WE ALL KNOW THAT, FOUR-LEGS IN THE BED, DOES NOT PUT FOOD ON THE TABE LOVE IS THE GOVERMENT ON EVERY BODYS LIFE WITHOUT LOVE IS ONLY EXCHAGE THEORY.
People should definately look before they leap! I once dated a guy without asking for ID and discovered too late he was much younger than myself! I then had to grow him up and move him on as it were. Age does matter very much, contrary to the popular belief of young people today! Age doesn’t matter to love, but in reality, both people must commit and be very mature to undertake a serious relationship such as marriage. I believe the goal of a serious relationship should be marriage for stability and for moral reasons. My parents were married and committed to one another for 57 years until my mother passed away! You won’t find that kind of committment under the sheets! They took care of one another when they were seriously ill and stood by one another through depression, loss, and discouragement. That is what true love is all about - staying together no matter what, just like in the vows!
I think this exchange theory is probably what actually runs the world. Although, it may not seem morally right, we are humans and this is a “dog eat dog world.” This goes on in so many aspects in our lives it goes unnoticed and is acceptable. In some cirumstances I feel one should not take advantage of another but like you said the old saying goes… “if you have nothing to bring to thre table, then you ain’t eating!” Every person has the capability of bringing “something to the table”, so I don’t see any problem with this theory. It will continue to run our lives and honestly, because we are humans and not one of us is perfect, it seems logical.
Kristen Darisse M&W 7:05 ~ extra credit
I totally agree with the “exchange theory”. In fact, I have been guilty of this. The first thing i do now when I meet a man is ask him what can he do to benefit me. In asking this question I am not just looking for a means of financial support. I have four young children and their well being is very important to me. The last guy I had this conversation with talked a good game about what he could do for my girls and I but he has a child and I have never known him to have him. This day and time you have to look at how your relationship with someone will be beneficial.
I think this so called “exchange theory” is actually something to make many successful in the long run. I think it would benefit women more than men though, because not many women doctors would date a young charming man who works at taco bell while he is going through college. It just wouldnt work out because her maturity level as a doctor is much more different scale of thinking then the young man, and the reason I say this is because realistically a man with money is much to a young women, but there are always exceptions to this rule. I understand looks could play a role in the decison making process of an sapiring doctor in search of a young beauty, but if I was the doctor I would search for personality and many characteristics that gorgeous young women have not acquired in this day of time.
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I believe that all in life is to negociate things. in order to do something, we need to see what we can get in return to it or what that person is going to lose. like you said in business and relationships we have to ask aourselves questions and see what we can offer and what we can get. it is the exchange theory both sides have to be satisfy with each other. because now in these days no one wants to lose something without getting something else in return.
You are sooo correct on this one, hitting the nail on the head! I see this in my office daily, with Managers dating secretaries, Engineers dating the waitresses. Even with the hiring practices, I am seeing the faces in the offices getting younger and thinner with late hours on certain floors; the smaller district offices are loosing their trainees to headquarters and area offices for a more prestige named position with less work than a common secretary. Trading is not just on Wall-Street anymore!
This article is very true. The exchange theory is a major part of our everyday lives whether we choose to acknowledge it or not. In every relationship you ask yourself does he offer what i want and am i offering him what he wants. If your needs and wants meet up things are good, if they dont then thats your own problem to deal with. In the case of older women dating younger men, good for them i guess.
Larre Wilson2155458 This is a very interesting topic and is the truth concerning the world about the exchange theory, however culture plays a significant role in defining how people approach relationships. I agree that one should measure the individual base on what he or she can bring to the table, on the other hand love should be the main ingredient in relationships matter.
The Exchange Theory is definitely seen in our society. Relationships tend to work out when this theory is in effect. These relationships do not necessarily have to involve love. A relationship between a salesperson and a customer is a great example. If a person is selling me a TV, I would want to feel comfortable and not rushed to buy it. I would like to feel welcomed and know everything there is to know about the TV. In exchange, he would make the sale. However, if I walk into a store not wanting to buy anything and the salesperson gives me the same welcoming feeling and information about the TV, he/she pretty much wasted his/her time because I was just “window” shopping. There was no exchange. Same thing for a relationship between two people; if a man finds a beautiful woman that doesn’t want to do anything in the relationship, the guy pretty much wasted his time. The Exchange Theory is a very important tool that helps us determine if our time was spent wisely.
I believe that relationships these days are more about whats in it for them, rather than the whole love factor. It shouldn’t be this way, but it is. Women tend to consider a mans success and postition in the workplace a lot more now. They want to make sure they are set for life. Love should be the basis for all relationships, part of me believes that this is the reason for so many failed relationships and divorces today.
Wow this article is very true. Majority of us in America and around the world both men and women are guilty in using the exchange theory in our relationships.
i think that this is very true in our society now days. back then love was literally LOVE…now sometimes its just sex, money and material things rather than true love. i always asks myself when i talk to a guy if he is in the same category of mine or better? if he doesnt have what i want or isnt as highly educated as i plan to be then to me he doesnt have much to offer. i know we shouldnt look at things that way but you cant take care of a man that cannot take care of himself? what does he have to offer?
Yes, this is true. This has always been true, and always will be true. The problem today, is people are too selfish to consider what they can offer soemone. All they care about is what can they get out of the relationship, what is in it for them! We would live in such a better world, if people would just start putting others before themselves! I think you offer good advice. I just hope people are listening!
Govt 2302 T-TR 11:00-12:20
I think that this is some what true. Yes you do think of what the other person can offer you, you even think of what you can offer them. This is part of the process of if you want to start a relationship with a person. It’s like it is part of your check list.
True, to us humans life is all about what can we get out of things. Unfortunately us humans are naturally greedy, and want all the best to ourselves without sometimes thinking about what we are offering our partners. The “Exchange Theory” proofs to be very true in the case of the old man and the young woman because they are both receiving something from the relationship but i ask myself what if both of us are just regular people with no wealth,the same age and the same aspirations, how do we dicide then if that person is really the right person for us or if we should just keep looking? Do we just keep looking for an old lady with money or do we exchange that and keep the young,poor girl that we have because of love.. What place does love have in the so called “Exchange Theory.”
exchange theory can be applied to many things in our societies in business, schools, and in every body live works with the law because exchange theory. I can’t imgaine how things would work if exchange theory this for that is pretty how the world works although other aspects go unseen which and that is unforunate.
I agree with this article. I think a lot of people consider the things mentioned in the piece but i do believe some people do not look or pay attention to that at all. Which way is better? Probably the method that is described in this letter. Some people don’t pay attention to any signs and just go with what they feel is best and some relationships work like that. But for those ones that did work like that there is a whole lot more that failed. So maybe people should start paying attention to what there significant someone has to bring to the table and see if he or she can hold there own. And then maybe we wont be seeing all these divorces.
This i agree with to the fullest! Exchange theory we use everyday! You may think looks are a must but believe me, its not a priority. If there is nothing good they can offer don’t even get involved. What for? This will only bring problems. Been there done that. One person should not have to have full responsibility it will never work out.
So true. What we mainly always exchange tends to be time. To get that brand new car, we spend time working, earning money. Same thing if we want that new game system, that new plasma tv, a house, a meal and so on. It’s not the same for everyone though, like those born with a silver spoon in their mouths. Something is always given up, whether it’s something of equal value or not. This principle is seen every time we choose between something or somethings. A choice between buying name brand shoes over the cheaper, payless or wal-mart shoes. On one hand, you gain a sense of importance with the brand names that people will probably notice and see in a positive way; on the other, you save money. Before I sat here and read this article, I made a choice. Spend my time for 10 extra points or do something else; nap, hang with friends, play video games, etc. “Don’t come to the table if you have nothing to bring.” Why work if you don’t want money or enjoy what you’re doing? Exchange theory is one of the most basic fundamental principles in life yet somehow many people don’t pay much attention to it. Go figure.
The exchange theory is so very true especially in todays society that all we look at is only material items. People today are scandolous and they wanna know what you got and they will find out fast to see if that you are worth sticking around for. I believe social networking has really reset the standards because the availabitly of one another. If you dont have what they are looking for then they are going to move on to the next person. Looks really determine how everything is going to play out in a relationship because people will put up with a little more crap just cause that person is a little prettier. Real relationship take time and effort which people now and days just arent willing to do anymore unless they are the ones that are going to be winning in the exchange