Domestic Violence
Domestic violence in the United States, always appears to be one sided. We always hear about the abusive husband or boyfriend, but, we very seldom hear about the abusive wife or girlfriend. Now most people think that it is a joke, when they hear about a wife or girlfriend attacking her spouse or boyfriend, but, it does happen more than our society,would be willing to admit. There are guys who are in abusive relationships, with the opposite sex, but no man is going to admit that his wife or girlfriend, is abusive or violent in anyway, and, we all know why. If a man reports to authorities, that his wife or girlfriend is physically,or verbally abusive, either they probably will not take him serious, or he will be looked upon as being weak. For example, let’s take the Chris Brown and Rihanna situation. Everybody, appears to be taking Rihanna side as the gospel, and, thus, has made her out be be this poor innocent victim, who was attacked by this mean and angry black man, Chris Brown. But, not once, did I hear the media, raise any questions to Rihanna, concerning, whether, or not she had done anything to Chris Brown. However, as time when on, it later came out that Rihanna, had been abusive to Chris Brown, both verbally and physically, such as throwing phones up side of his head, and, even she admitted, that she would do things to provoke Mr. Brown. But, I did not see or hear about the record industry, stop playing her music. She did not have to do any hours of community work, nor did she have to go on any talk shows, to try to vindicate herself. This is an advantage that women have, and believe me they know it. A woman knows that if she attacks a man verbally or physically, that the society that we live in, does not look at her actions as near as bad, as if it were the other way around. In fact, if a woman is abusive to a man verbally or physically, the tendency is to assume, that the man has done something to her, which is nothing but reverse sexism, and, this is even more true in the African American and Hispanic communities. What men must start doing, is reporting to authorities, when they have abusive wives and girlfriends, especially those who attack them physically, because their are some violent females who dwell in our society, and, if men start coming forth, and letting this be known, then and only then, will the image of domestic violence change. It is not right for a man to hit a woman, and it is not right for a woman to hit a man, everyone should just keep their hands to themselves.
The Bowtie Professor Speaks!
Tags: Violence In America
This entry was posted on Thursday, November 19th, 2009 at 10:01 am and is filed under The Family, Topics Of Controversy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
This is a very interesting article. In any situation the man will always be questioned first because of what is in most cases stated their fault for anything. It is true that men would be looked down upon if the man is being physically or mentally abused by his spouse or girlfriend. Society does look down upon men who does not take authority in their relationship. With the Chris Brown and Rhianna was a win lose situation. Whatever Chris Brown would have said would have made him look like the bad guy because he in turn still put his hands on her. The tampered photographs made his situation look even worse. Rhianna was glorified as a battered woman because no matter what he said it still did not make any difference in the public eye. If a man reports abuse to the police they wont believe him, so the situation for a man is hopeless. To prove it Chris Brown was tainted as a woman beater, because of that his records were banned from the shelves and he wasn’t able to make any money until now a year later. So in any situation just to prevent domestic violence all together men should keep their hands to themselves and women should too.
I agree, there are many violent ladies in our society but regardless of who is the abuser violence do not solve the issues. I don’t agree that females should get away from punishment/criticism or that society portray them as angels when they can be as bad as man. They should get the same punishment regardless if they have kids or not. Also it seems that when men are kind and lay back, females tend to take advantage of the situation. I think if all abuse is reported, it would send a message to those abusive females that enough is enough. It does not make a man less man if they report abuse. There are ladies that appreciate a nice, gentleman still living in this country and vice versa. Again regardless of who is abusing who, I think violence is very unhealthy. It can escalate to levels that one can repent really fast.
Like patel said, “violence is not acceptable in any means.” If a woman hits a man, that man should then go and report the abuse. In society to women know that we could get away with hitting or verbally abusing a man because no one would believe the mans side. Now if that man has proof, then that a different story. But if a woman was acussed of doing it she could say that the man as been abussing her for so many years, and the police would take her side. Like with the Chris brown and Rihanna situation, no one knows what happened in that car. Not saying that what chris did was ok, but we don’t know. In rihanna’s country, its been known that women abuse there husband’s and boyfriend’s. But look who side they took rihanna’s, just cause she’s a woman they didn’t come down on her like they did chris brown. I know some people that have been in a abuse relationship, and in some cases it was the man doing the abuse. Most women don’t report the abuse, they just sit there and let it continue until they reach a near death experience. Men are the same way, they shouldn’t hold that information back because they will appear weak. Women and men should go and report the abuse, and don’t let it continue
Do you realize that any type of domestic violence is brought on by those who are closest to us or those who “love us,” i.e. friends, siblings, parents, boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, etc. If those close to us treat us this way, what can we expect from those that do NOT love us.?
Domestic violence is a threat to the world in general, I completely agree that most times we hear cases of parents towards children or males towards females but seldom do we hear the female abuse towards males. It is in fact because of fear of judgment, of what will people say, feel, or think of them. But I feel that it is our own fault in why males hesitate to report such things. From the beginning of times, the man has been placed, by God himself, the head of the house, therefore, socially it is seen the same way. If the man is being mistreated, then without a doubt the first thought in mind would be “weak or not man enough.” If one by one, instead of criticizing we help the person, then the general social view point would change all together.
This is a problem that was created by man himself, (by man I mean male/female) therefore it is something that can be stopped or changed around. The only way we can stop or change something is by taking a look at ourselves and making the change.
Although judgment does play an important role, I also feel that it is one’s own personal decision. Sometimes these situations occur to an extreme because of lack of confidence in one’s own self. If we respect ourselves and believe in ourselves as strongly and as much as we say we do (male or female) cases like these would occur less. It can be debatable that by the time a situation like this occurs, you have already fallen into a deep feeling relationship with your partner that makes it impossible to leave their side. Again, how much do you value yourself, what is more important at this point, your relationship, your pride, or your life?
I would personally like for people to say “this is where she ran,” instead of “this is where she died.”
This article is very interesting and can be discussed with both sexs. It is true no man should ever lay a hand on a woman. Yes, it has happened but there is no reason for any woman to be abused verbally or physically. But then you look at the other sex which is women. It is also not right for them to abuse guys. When a man is abused there not going to go off and tell the cops or anybody else. They will not seek for help because they dont want to be looked down on as weak. Which no man would. The chris brown and rihana is a perfectlly good example of women taking advantage of them being women by thinking they can hurt a man thinking they will not get hit backed. In this case as you can see chris brown got tired of being pushed around and taking advantage of and bsically what he did was put her in her place. Yes, it was wrong but the reason for him never saying anything was because he was embarassed of what the media would say. But instead came out being the enemy. I have witnessed a case were my nieghbor was brutillay beating his girl. I panicked but took matters into my own hands and confronted the guy. He stopped i threathened him by calling the cops. The girl drove off, two weeks later the girl returned making me confused. So maybe some girls like being treated bad. But as said in this article everybody should just keep there hands to there selfs.
No matter what the situation violence should not be the answer to a solution, because it only tends to make things worse. Although we see violence all around us through media and other formats it is not something we should relay on because violence never fixes anything but instead makes things worse. Also I believe that at no time should a man ever hit a woman but at the same time neither should a woman hit a man. Even though the majority of men never report there abusive wives or girlfriends it is important for them to stand up and report what is being done to them. If they allow this to continue without speaking up than the community will never know about the concerns and seriousness of abusive wives and girlfriends. I also know that some women can be just as bad as man so therefore should get punished like any other male would for their actions and should face the consiquences. Although no relationship is ever perfect there are more successful ways to solve problems that don’t require violence and sometimes just talking things through and letting each other know how you feel fixes more problems than violence could ever do.
I agree in both sex their is men an women that are abbusive, but the women always seem to get away even if they are the main ones causing violence. Some one is not gonna believe that a women is abusing thier husband i mean everyone think its logical that a man is stronger than that a women so they seem to get away in that case. For example have you seen that tv show Teen Mom of the couple Gary and Amber she was very abbusive to him verbally and physically he never touched her he actually tried so many ways to just try to stop that but she still kept with the violence. You see as a woman i speak that their is many relationships that the women is that cause of the violence. I also agree if a man was to complain or try to stop the violence people would see him as a weak person since he is a male. I think that in both situations the punishment should be equally for both men and women i mean their still humans just cause the man in known to be stronger doesnt mean that the women shouldnt get the same punishment. The society sees it also that if they have kids the women should still be not punish to take care of the kids but that can also be a bad things you never know if she may be abusing the kids as well as she does the husband. Well were I am going here is I believe that both sex’s should be treated fairly violenece is still violence no matter who it comes from.